Day 5 The fluorescent octopus
Having survived the intense, internal cleansing, I sat down for another day of Full Body Molecular Massage. It is quite impressive, that what scientists now know about atoms and subatomic particles, were "discovered" by Buddha 2,500 years ago. He did this by meditating, using this technique, and becoming fully aware of his body. Pretty amazing. Decades ahead of modern science who only observed this. They did not experience it The Buddha was a scientist of the world within. He experienced it, as I was beginning to. Observing is not experiencing. For example, we can see food, smell food, but until we eat it, we are not experiencing it. How can one explain a feeling one has not experienced?
Today was another day of scanning, or sweeping the body. Starting at the head down to the toes and back, observing sensations. Although I did not have any dead areas or blockages, I did notice something. When I reached my midsection, (solar plexus, stomach, around the naval) that's when my mind began to wander. I was able to completely follow instructions, quite well, until I reached my middle. That has been an area of trouble for me. I had an ulcer in high school, which is completely healed, but when stressed, it affects my bowels. Doesn't take long either. Surprising how instant it is. Those who know me well are aware of this. When something serious arises, Tyler, my son asks "So do you have to go poop, Mom?" When my former husband wrecked my van, he called and said "Are you close to a toilet?" Luckily, I was. There were many times I needed to be close to a toilet in that marriage.
Meanwhile, directly behind me, the coughing woman still sat. She was at the back wall, and would turn her head to the side when she coughed. This only amplified the sound, as it hit the wall and moved around the room, echoing. Being a musician, I am somewhat aware of acoustics. In addition, I was right by the door, so when people came and went, granted it was not often, but even so, it was distracting. I continued to practice my patience and determination.
Also, I was finding Mr Goenka's chanting to be increasingly irritating. Long sustained belching. I certainly prefer Hawaiian chanting. It was such a struggle to make it through the day. God, 5 more full days! Never has time passed so slowly in my life. Continuing my work, I began to picture something that helped. Not a visual, just an internal association. We were instructed that we were not to see visions, or have any out of body experiences. I have meditated often in a group, while others "left their bodies" saw visions, etc. I never did. It made me feel pretty inferior as a meditator. Lucky for me, that was not our goal. Our purpose was to be in touch with our bodies, not leave them. So, I did not see a vision of this, but I did experience it inside my body. It was like a sparkling fluorescent octopus. Have you ever seen an octopus "breathe"? There is a pulsing, rhythmic flow as they take in and express water. Like a beating heart. That is what my pulsing felt like. And the tingling was his sparkling tentacles moving through my body, from my spine out to the skin. The fluorescent feeling was the subatomic particles, I moved him (or her) from the top of my head to my feet and back. The sensation gave me a "buzz" as I mentioned. It was rather invigorating. I liked it.
But I was ahead of our class again. This day we were to continue to concentrate only on the surface of our bodies. That evening at discourse, he said for us to begin to move our awareness to our inner bodies, including our organs. I already intuitively did that. I didn't plan to. It just seemed to happen.
And the cougher coughed. And that night began the Midnight Mutiny of One.
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